Breathe (Raspberries Rewrite)

The original intent of “Raspberries” was to write a non-erotic sex scene. While I think I achieved that, in large part it was due to shitty writing. It may have only been a couple months since I first wrote the scene, but I hope I’ve improved. Overuse of pronouns and run-on sentences are intentional.

Always inattentive, the headphones in his ears keep Rio from hearing her return. The slippery footsteps, the soft thud of the door, and then the nervous breaths all go unheeded. It’s the smell of raspberries that makes him turn around.